Life as a Mum… some days it’s amazing, some days it’s challenging, but everyday it brings a reward. Whether it be in the form of a giggle, smile or baby babble conversations.
There are so many things that I was very unprepared for. Silly things.
Being thrown in to the nappy filled, milk drenched deep end is daunting. What if I’m not doing it right? What does the book say? How are these Mums on social media making it look so easy?
First off, the book that gets given to all eager Mums to be is helpful to a point. It is not tailored to my baby and therefore, isn’t always right. I have realised the best way to really know what my baby wants is to get to know her.
It is important to realise that this takes time. Just because she grew and lived inside me for 9 months doesn’t mean she came out knowing who I was. It doesn’t mean I knew all her little ‘tells’. Far from it.
And the Mums on Instagram? Well as I have said over and over; they are winging it just like me. They just so happen to look a bit better at it!
I think it’s fair to say that it has really taken me until now (just over 3 months in) to really get a slight handle on things.
From day one I was keen to establish a routine. It quickly went out the window. Despite lots of (sometimes unwanted) advice, books and giving into Google’s 24 hour services, every baby is unique.
Thankfully I’m not one to give up easily and persistence paid off. Ellie now sleeps through the night and I know roughly when she will nap throughout the day. We have little ooh and aah conversations and even at this stage, I still stare at her, heart melting, as she sleeps.
Life as a Mum outside the home made me anxious from the get go. How do I make feeds? What about changing her nappy? What if she has a massive tantrum and I can’t comfort her?
I can honestly say that the one thing that often holds me back is my anxiety. I often worry that I’m not doing things right and I am conscious that my worries will ultimately hold Ellie back.
Over the last few weeks I’ve adopted a more carefree attitude to the things that worry me and I’ve forced myself to do things outwith my comfort zone. The outcome? It’s never been as bad as my mind thinks it will be. Oh and I feel just a teeny bit proud of myself, and much happier!
As the time goes by too quickly, I’m slowly but surely adapting to my life as a Mum.
Until next time…